Buffett Caption Contest – Win A PORTOPONG!

posted December 18th, 2008 at 11:45 am

by Josh Martin

Time for the final Buffett Caption Contest of 2008… and our friends at PortOPong are making this a special contest, because the winner will receive a PortOPong!

Here’s this week’s image:

Come up with your own caption for the photo and submit it in the comments section of this post.

On Sunday, we’ll choose five of the best and put them in a poll for everyone to vote on. The poll will close on Wednesday and the top vote-getter will receive the PortOPong!


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Tagged in Caption Contest, Contests

  • parrothead mania

    See, I told you there was a woman to blame, now arrest her and give me back my shaker of salt!

  • Bob Garvin

    I did not make those tract on the hood officer

  • Bob Garvin

    I did not make those tracks on the hood officer

  • Nick Devlin

    “I saw that guy over there steal my peanut butter!”

  • Eli Mak

    …but I gave that patrol car back years ago. It was cold and I couldn’t find a taxi. Ask the boys in Boston!

  • Eli Mak

    Coastal confessions is just the name of the song, I got nothing for ya, go arrest that woman going crazy down on Caroline street, man.

  • Eli Mak

    You and I both know that there is a statute of limitations on Cuban crimes of passion, so you need to leave

  • Eli Mak

    That filling station hold up thing was just a big misunderstanding

  • Eli Mak

    No, I will not show you my license to chill

  • Eli Mak

    it may sound simply complicated, but thats my story and I’m sticking to it!

  • steve

    That’s her officer, right over there. All I remember is I was standing by a phone booth outside a bar and the next thing I know she tells me we’re engaged.

  • steve

    Yep, I was singing on stage and she hit me right on the noggin with this big ole beach ball.

  • steve

    Look at’em out there officer. Everywhere I go they just show up. Thousands of’em. And they always where those crazy fin hats and parrot costumes. I feel like I can’t even breathe. Just make’em go away.

  • steve

    Just look at her. Now you gotta admit she does look older than fifteen.

  • Joe

    Yes officer, thats who stole my lost shaker of salt!!!!

  • Frankie

    “we are the people our parents warned us about “

  • Todd Logan

    Officer, it is THAT woman who is going crazy on Caroline Street!! Oh, and if your gentle and sweet she’ll show you her place!

  • Travis

    HEY LUKE…there goes your career!

  • Jack Jones

    Hey, thats the T.V. your father was
    holding that night at the Krystal

  • RJ foster

    That’s them officer. Those are the guys that tore down the Bama Breeze!

  • Colorado Pirate

    I told you, Math Sucks.

  • Jen

    Where is your School Boy Heart officer? Little Johnny didn’t set off a stink bomb…he just broke Banana Wind!

  • Justin

    ALRIGHT! Which one of you Parrotheads said “Shenanigans”??? I swear to God I’ll pistol whip ‘ya!

  • Susan

    Yes, he’s the one who stole the peanut butter and sardines, Officer!

  • Kevin Parrish

    Look behind Door Number Three!!!!!!!!!

  • Kevin Parrish

    Look at all those Fruitcakes! Get me outta here!

  • Kevin Parrish

    It’s the blonde stranger in the stationwagon full of kids!

  • Mark Moore

    I tell you that is Buddy Bear and he did take my Still. Now you go and ask for it back.

  • Scotty B

    As I flew into Jamaica, Officer, they started shooting at my plane right about there….

  • Sean

    See Officer, Owen was throwing spit wads at the teacher when she told me it was my fault!!! Hell it could be I guess.

  • Sean

    Officer Wilson, I swear it wasn’t my fault.

  • Sean

    I can’t see staight officer. Shoot the one in the middle.

  • Bubba

    Officer, see that kid Roy. Would you please shoot the little creep, I’d like to date his cute mother?

  • Scott Ward

    Who’s the blonde stranger?

  • Bud Sullivan

    See that tall blond stranger over there…he’s the one that told me it was five o’clock somewhere and insisted it was here!

  • Brian Wolfinger

    Yes sir, it was those Jamaicans that did all the shooting.

  • http://finsup.com DrBourbon

    Officer, these kid’s don’t believe in Santa!

  • Patrick Gordon

    “Truthfully Officer he’s the one that stole the peanut butter, I only took the can of sardines”

  • Kevin Jackson

    “It’s five O’clock over there!”

  • Stu Symes

    “That’s him!”

    “Pretending to be a Parrothead. The one with the bootleg Margarittaville yellow shirt. I appreciate your help.”

    “Gives us room for one more at our concert!”

  • Bil

    Jimmy Buffett, Guest speaker in a law enforcement class??!!

  • Al

    Sixteen may get me twenty? But I was rockin’ and a’ rollin’ on a Livingston Saturday night!!

  • captain bill

    Yes ! Officer she’s the one, she stole my portapong ball and hid it right between her Ti#$$%ts !

  • Eddie

    He stole the peanut butter and the can of sardines, I swear! I wasn’t stealing, I was taking back.

  • Bob Hess

    That crazy Parrothead has the nerve to want my autograph!

  • Dot.

    That’s him officer. Buddy Bear. That’s who stole the still.

  • Pam

    Look Officer!!, Mac is the guy you want, I’m just a school boy at heart!!

  • Frank

    “There he is. The Jolly Man.

    Over There.the Gypsies in the Palace.

  • Suburban Beachbum

    He pulled a knife, took poor Danny’s life, and then he turned his own cold hand!

  • David Waters

    He’s the one that stole my hair!

  • Chris

    Listen you, I don’t give a HOOT who you are, if I tell you that Pacific swells are usually a lot bigger than Atlanta swells, then that’s what I mean! Ain’t that right officer?

  • Matt W.

    “I’ve done a bit of smugglin’
    and I’ve run my share of grass, but that guy stole my shaker of salt!”

  • Zane B

    No No officer….when the volcano blows I know exactly which way I’m a gonna go!

  • Katie

    I told you that we have only come for chicken- we are not a ganja plane!!

  • Chris Austin

    “HE is the person our parents warned us about…now take him out…”

  • Bill Molyneux

    Eenie meany miney mo. Catch a Parott Head by the toe.

  • pga1213

    He took the Peanut Butter!!!

  • max

    i won’t take a breathalizer, and there’s no way i can fill that cup from here.

  • Ken

    Quick officer, there goes those Gypsies that ransacked my palace.

  • Lacey B

    I think that Pirate just stole my plane!

  • Shana

    Well gah-ah-ah-ah-ly………. that clock says it’s 5:00, doesn’t it?!

  • HotRodtheLoveGod

    Look Officer …I told you it was “A,B,C,D…”
    now, do I still have to stand on one foot and touch my nose or can I head back to Desdemona’s Space Station and Bake Shop?

  • Parrot_head98

    I tell ya, they shot from the lighthouse, they shot from the highway, they shot from the cliffs…and all we wanted was CHICKEN!!!!

  • mutts

    Fingers is holed up in that there bathroom with a bottle of Margarittaville Tequila, some good ganga and somebody’s drunken 15 year old girlfriend that they were suppose to take home.

  • Barry Rue

    “That’s the ganja plane! I’m just here for the chicken.”

  • Josh

    Wait, didn’t I spot you while I was flying over some island in the Pacific??

  • greg c.

    Arrest that woman! She lost my shaker of salt!

  • Barbara

    I wasn’t part of the peanut butter conspiracy, he was!!!

  • john kahuila

    did you see that, it looks like a fin, i swear i see a fin

  • Ray

    That’s right officer charge those 3 right their Shikera, Mac and Mr. Uttley

  • Mark P

    Officer are those real or fake? Well know for sure when I touch them with the cold steel of my pistol….

  • Big Al

    Your voice sounds familiar but your face don’t look too clear.

  • Shawn

    I’m telling you officer, I didn’t steal the peanutbutter but the guy that did ran that way.

  • Shawn

    I’m telling you officer, I didn’t steal the peanut butter but I saw the guy that did and he went that way

  • Katherine

    see…see that spider….no sudden moves , i think its poisonis.

  • Rex

    He took the peanut butter i took the sardines

  • Cigar Head “Cig” Milks

    Office, you need not arrest these kids. All they were looking for is some PURE ESCAPISM-Jimmy Buffett style!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • John

    No Sir. No Sir. It was not me, I was Somewhere Over China!!



  • parrotdad

    Are you sure you’re not Barney Fife?

  • http://www.clubstsomewhere.com Jackson

    OK Officer. I want you to shoot the next person that request I play Margaritaville!

  • Bob C.

    The Great Filling Station Hold-up? Talk to him over there!

  • David W.

    “Hey! Isn’t that my Hemisphere Dancer?!”

  • tammy

    Jimmy, I know what you are saying but do I really have to take off my pants for not getting the ball in the portopong???? I thought you were kidding!!!!

  • Bluedog

    That’s the kid, officer, Jeff Spicoli. He keeps calling my house and asking me to play a song and when I ask him which one, he says “I Don’t Know.”

  • http://smokin.rocks.it smokin dave

    No No….the Hurricane is in that tall glass right there…its not the weather forecast !!!

  • Butch

    Those look just like my coconuts !! I’d recognize them anywhere.

  • Ken Kehoe

    That guy, officer… he is the one who stole my hair!

  • Ken Kehoe

    My own damn fault…. ummmm, no… it’s that woman to blame!

  • Ken Kehoe

    You get toseed out of one NBA game and you get stuck being saddled with one of these guys for life!

  • Eddie D.

    “Hey Ellis Dee!!!!! Get out of the street. Don’t get high on my beat. Go on home the policeman warns…”

  • RobertG

    over there – those people claim that there’s a woman to blame!

  • Derek

    “I’ve been through this before….see those holes in my plane, it seems to be a case of mistaken identity, again”

  • jeff clark

    I don’t give a “Hoot” what that kid said we were just coming in for chicken. you are makin a big mistaka.

  • Steve Cantwell

    Sheriff that’s the one who I was dancing on the hood of your car…..

  • http://www.a-fresh-perspective.com Lisa

    I keep telling you guys…they’re landsharks. That’s just who they are. Just because they are out on my boat is no big deal. Now, where do I go to bail them out?

  • RobertG

    I’ve seen Fruitcakes…I saw that guy in Santa Monica roller skate naked thru the crosswalk!

  • last mango

    I am telling you, that 80 year old lady is sporting her own coconuts, they are not props!

  • RobertG

    Look – here comes Mick Jagger with the tip jar to pay my bail!!!

  • RobertG

    He’s crazy and dangerous!
    He’s the outlaw in all of us – the environmental terrorist!

  • Trent

    And over there are the fins to the left….

  • steve

    It’s his fault officer. He was hitch hiking and I picked him up. Next thing I know we’re sticking up a fillin’ station.

  • steve

    Arrest both of’em officer. One of is called Snake and the other one works for me. They were supposed to be house sitting and tore my place up.

  • sunnyd

    That’s them right over there (pointing)!! they took my surfboard, my cooler full of landsharks, & yanked the Margarita from my hand !! Lock ‘em up, Officer !

  • steve

    That big guy chased me all the way down here officer. Would you please tell him that it’s my freezer and I can shoot six holes in it I want to?

  • steve

    Hey look. There’s a Margaritaville across the street. Wanna grab a drink when you get off duty?

  • steve

    Look at’em officer. They’re after me. They really take things personal around here. I thought everybody heard Fruitcakes by now.

  • RobertG

    See those tourists covered with oil?
    The sun’s gonna bake ‘em! Do something!!

  • Jules Catton

    I wish I was somewhere other than here!! That great filling station holdup cost me three good years!!

  • RobertG

    Talk to that guy over there, Bob Robert – he asked me to fix the circuit breaker in the souvenir shop!

  • Janet Johnson

    Look, Santa’s going in Margaritaville again. Can’t keep him away from the cheeseburgers.

  • Frank Novoa

    ”I was right officer, it wasn’t me that had the ecstacy on my plane…he did it”

  • Kathy Devore

    That’s him officer, He took the WHOLE bottle of rum!!!!!

    Kathy DeVore
    Searcy, Arkansas

  • Kathy Devore

    But officer, that Filling Station Holdup was many years ago!!!!!

  • Tracy

    “Officer, I swear — it was the kid, I swear the kid that was “smoking” that stuff in the bathroom- he ran that way” pointing!

  • Cheryl

    Go Now! and make Hunter S Thompson proud….

  • Richard Stein

    “Don’t tell me it’s my damn fault, there’s the woman to blame!”

  • http://www.buffettworld.com Mike Maher

    I TOLD you I have a receipt for that Peanut Butter, see you in court!

  • Shane Patton

    Did you see that unicorn? Man I sure feel good officer!

  • steve wood

    Sheriff, I think I see a great white shark, but are the fins to the left or to the right?

  • http://yahoo Lavonne Sturm

    I believe the “women to blame ” went that way !

  • http://yahoo Lavonne Sturm

    If you follow these Parrott Heads down this way, They will take you to Margaritaville !

  • anthony bencivengo

    officer, he ate the last mango in paris

  • Jimmy Rhea

    We know what the Jamaican SWAT team can hit…how ’bout you?

  • Kevin Parrish

    It’s the vampires and mummies!

  • Deanna Strother


  • Kevin Parrish

    I pushed the fool button, but That skinny boy stormed the stage!

  • http://ericbresinski@mac.com eric bresinski

    Office the Jolly Man did it! You can find him behind door #3.

  • Dave

    Fingerbang! HeHeHe

  • Mrs Z198

    That’s the woman to blame for my missing shaker of salt!

  • Steve Smith

    There they are, the Jamaican SWAT team!!!!

  • Mrs Z198

    That’s the guy over there who ate all of your donuts officer.

  • Mrs Z198

    I think I saw Mac and Mr. Utley with a box of donuts over there.

  • Todd

    There goes Utley in that plastic ass again!!

  • sodagirl54

    STOP!!! In the name of LOVE.

  • Jay

    I swear officer, the students said they were 21 when I brought in the Margarita Machine for the Christmas Party !

  • Ashley

    Well, let me explain this to yall once again, “I ain’t no drinking man”.

  • Tom

    And that guy over there is who sold me on this lousy script!

  • Tom

    OK, OK, the movie may stink but calling it POOT instead of HOOT is un-called for!

  • Scott

    There they are officer, the Jamaicans that shot up my plane!

  • Mel

    Dont be jelous, were @ Tony’s Bar & enjoyed Tony signing your cute wifes Butt.

  • Mel

    Officer, Look, those are the Guys who left Tony to Die in Jersey !!!

  • Mel

    She’s the one who flashed her nakid Double D’s @ me Officer, that a crime ?

  • Mel

    Officer, please arrest that man, He finished the “Duvall Crawl” & keeps grapping my wifes cute butt.

  • Andy

    Give a HOOT and don’t pollute…

  • BlondeStranger

    That guy right over there officer…I’m sure he’s the one who rode my pony to the sand…somewhere!

  • Jackie Bryant

    It’s only a matgarita in his hand………..

  • http://yahoo.com woody

    he was with this hot chick and a puppy,said he was your brother but i didnt see the resemblance,he said they where going to the waffle house over there

  • http://yahoo.com woody

    i was just showing the girls in the orange shorts that there really are owls over there.

  • doug peterson

    There she is!! arrest her officer, Brittney is impersonating a singer….AGAIN!!!

  • cindi

    “Your Honor, before they haul me into the courtroom, I just want you to know that was a ‘love song’ from a slightly different point of view. Furthermore, I didn’t realize this was a dry county!”

  • Rick

    Ho, ho, ho! and a bot-tle of rum!…. Santa’s run off to the car-ib-be-an! That way!

  • cindi

    “If you don’t arrest those 3rd graders who stole the ‘Green Tomato’ You will never work in dis business again!”


    I had nothing to do with that [great] filling station hold-up officer. Parrot head’s honor.

  • David

    “Who’s the blond stranger?”

  • Bruce

    Off icer…..I think that group in the back has
    my missing salt shaker……yes the rowdy bunch!

  • Jan

    That’s him Owen, I mean, Officer! He was running from the Green Tomato with the parrot under his right arm, a pina coloda in one hand and a margarita in the other!

  • randy ingle

    officer i think shes got my lost shaker of salt..

  • cindi

    “If you don’t find this 3rd grade class driving down a1a in the Green Tomato, you’ll be missing more than a shaker of salt. I’ll have your badge and you’ll never work in dis business again!”

  • zach

    I Swear!! He gave me a license to chill!!

  • zach

    Officer, I can almost prove I gave them VIRGIN margaritas!

  • zach

    It was that one! Yea the scrawny kid in the back with the yellow shirt and wristbands. He’s been listening to the Damn Jimmy Buffett again!!!

  • Paul

    Officer, there is God’s own drunk and a fearless man!

  • cindi

    “With all due respect Principal Finn, I was not trespassing on school grounds. Blagojevich promised me that seat on the school board for my career day presentation on the occupation of ‘Pirate’ a few months ago!”

  • Blake Cole

    That’s the guy your looking for officer, right over there. That Michael Utley guy is the one that is always making trouble around here!

  • Blake Cole

    That’s the guy I called you about! He actually shot the lock off my liquor cabinet!!!

    Man, you can’t get anyone to house-sit for you anymore.

  • curtis moore

    you dont have to draw your gun its just the conch tour train full of parrott heads

  • cindi

    “I don’t care if Madonna is your momma. If you’re going to interrupt my career day presentation on the occupation of Pirate you must raise your Fin.”

  • pirate mike

    So, you’re Jose Cuervo! Drop that salt shaker mister.

  • Jan

    That’s him Luke, I mean, Officer! He was running from the Green Tomato with the parrot under his right arm, a pina coloda in one hand and a margarita in the other!

  • pirate mike

    Officer, I’m telling you that is Jose Cuervo, and he is the one who took the green tomato. He’s no friend of mine anymore!

  • pirate mike

    Badges, we don’t need no stinking badges lady!

  • pirate mike

    We don’t drink milk here in Margaritaville kid, so stop crying and give me back my shaker of salt!

  • woody

    just follow this road,the sign says jimmy buffetts margaritaville, you cant miss it…well maybe you could miss it.i dont know?

  • pirate mike

    Hey kid, put that Parrot back on Jimmy’s finger or I’ll pound the salt out of ya!

  • pirate mike

    Officer, I tell you that is Jose Cuervo, not the teacher, and he took my shaker of salt.

  • pirate mike

    You call yourself a science teacher and you can’t even make a Margarita!

  • pirate mike

    That’s my Parrot on his shoulder, do your duty!

  • pirate mike

    Minds don’t waste away here in Margaritaville, they are enhanced.

  • pirate mike

    Keep your dirty hands off my Parrot or We’ll be back!

  • http://JimmyBuffeyWorld A Blonde Stranger

    Really,she said she wanted a big kosher pickle.

  • pirate mike

    Tell your momma Sara Palin it’s always warm in Margaritaville

  • pirate mike

    Tell your momma Sarah Palin I can see Margaritaville from my back yard

  • Jan

    I saw him grab my pitcher of margaritas, and I threw my sandal at him. See the palm tree print on his forehead?

  • pirate mike

    I said take the weather with you when you go. I did not say take the Green Tomato!

  • pirate mike

    I did not say that. I said Cattle Truckin.

  • pirate mike

    That was my desk right over there, the one with the Parrot perch on it. Rod Blagojevich promised me THAT ONE.

  • http://JimmyBuffeyWorld A Blonde Stranger

    Class, these are the people your parents warned you about

  • pirate mike

    ain’t he a genius. Defying gravity by standing on his head.

  • cindi

    “I don’t care if you have more questions about being a pirate on career day. I told you the PowerPoint powers down at 4:58 ’cause I got a 5:00 appointment.”

  • pirate mike

    This officer insists that you take your hands out of your pocket slowly. That is not what Jolly Mon is about


    and I swear that’s not the first time I have found Mac doing that after to many drinks.

  • pirate mike

    This officer insists that you take your hands out of your pocket slowly. This is not anatomy class and that is not what Jolly Mon is about


    No sir, mine’s the classy little white and red parked next the gruman with bullet holes in it.


    We just came for chicken and I left my cell phone right there next to my vitamins, uhh, on second thought, forget about it these things never turn out good.

  • http://yahoo Vonnie

    Your looking for Fruit Cake? Do I have Fruit Cakes…They went that way !

  • Al

    Officer! Arrest that man! He’s a Jimmy Buffett impersonator and he goes by the name of Kenny Chesney!!!!!

  • pairethead

    “I told you….it’s not ecstasy, it’s vitamin B”

  • Tom R

    “Thanks for coming officer, I want to report that stony coral, illegally taken from the Keys.


    Is that chesney trying to be me again?

  • BlondeStranger

    Wait, wait, wait class, all the officer wants to know is, “What if the Hokey Pokey IS what it’s all about?”

  • http://JimmyBuffeyWorld talking parrot

    Yes that’s my son. He’s not bad, he’s just the son of a son of a sailor

  • Andy

    That is the Jamacian SWAT team right over there Officer.

  • Phyllis

    Margaritaville? Port tack just past Cayo Loco…

  • Cinemagal

    Last time I saw Madoff he was headed that way…

  • Steve

    That’s the girl, she stole my salt shaker!

  • chancie

    Officer, one of those seniors has my grass.

  • Scott

    There he is officer! The guy with the ‘scream’ mask sipping on a Margarita is the one who stole my hair!!!

  • Dave Fox

    The one in the back of the room is my “permanent reminder of a temporary feeling”, he’s a “piece of work”, take him away…..

  • Evan

    Officer, their was a Parrothead here a moment ago!! Where did he go, Oh I know he must of gone to Margaritaville…

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