Pencil Thin Mustache by Jimmy Buffett

Now they make new movies in old black and white
With happy endings, where nobody fights
So if you find yourself in that nostalgic rage
Honey, jump right up and show your age

I wish I had a pencil thin mustache
the "Boston Blackie" kind, or a
two-toned Ricky Ricardo jacket
and an autographed piture of Andy Divine

Oh, I remember bein’ buck toothed and skinny
Writin’ fan letters to Sky’s niece Penny
Oh, I wish I had a pencil-thin mustache
then I could solve some mysteries too

Oh it’s Bandstand, Disneyland, growin up fast
Drinkin’ on a fake I.D.
And Rama of the jungle was everyone’s Bawana
But only jazz musicians were smokin marajuana
Yeah, I wish I had a pencil-thin mustache
then I could solve some mysteries too

Ah Yeah Fing!


But then it’s flat-top, dirty bop, copin’ a feel’
grubbin on the living room floor
They send you off to college to try to gain
a little knowledge
But all you want to do is learn how to score
Yeah, but now I’m gettin’ old, don’t wear underwear
I don’t go to church, but I did cut my hair
But I can go to movies and see it all there
Just the way that it use to be

That’s why I wish I had a pencil-thin mustache
the "Boston Blackie" kind, or a
two-toned Ricky Ricardo jacket
And an autographed picture of Andy Divine

Oh, I could be anyone I wanted to be
Maybe suave Eerol Flynn or the Sheik of Araby
If I only had a pencil-thin mustache
then I could do some cruising too

Yeah, Brylcream, a little dab’ll do ya
Oh, I could do some crusing too

 Wonder Why We Ever Go Home by Jimmy Buffett

Years grow shorter, not longer
the more you’ve been on your own
Feelin’s for movin’ grow stronger’
so you wonder why you ever go home
wonder why you ever go home

People are movin’ so quickly
Humor’s in need of repair
Same occupations and same obligations
they’ve really got nothing to share
like drivin’ around with no spare

River gets deeper not shallow
the further you move down the stream
Wonderin’if I can keep her as I
race to keep up with my dreams
How they shine and glitter and gleam

Repeat First Verse



Landfall by Jimmy Buffett

Now what do they do if I just sailed away
Who the hell really compelled me to leave today
Runnin’ low on stories is what made it a ball
What would they do if made no landfall

I lived half my life in eight by five room
Just crusin’ to the sound of the big deisel boom
It’s not close quarters that would make me snap
It’s just dealing with the daily unadulterated crap

Sail away for a month at a time
Sail away I’ve got to recharge mind
Then you’ll find me back at it again

Oh I love the smell of fresh snapper fried lite
What’d you say, pouilly fuisse could round out the night
The mid morning watch is the best time to look
Oh what would they do if I wrote the big book

`Cause I’ve seen incredible things in 31 years
Somedays were laughter, others were tears
If I had it all to do over again
I’d just get myself drunk and I’d jump right back in

Sail away, that’s the way I survive
Sail away, that’s just no shuck and jive
It just makes this whole gig come alive

The wind whistled threw the cool rigging at night
Crazy crowds boogie to the sound and the lights
Bums down in Queros he’s just havin a ball
What would the do on another landfall
What would they do if I made no landfall
What if I hadn’t hit second at all
What would I do if I met Lauren McCall
Just Tryin’ to make a little sense of it all
Just tryin’ to make a little sense of it all



Miss You So Badly by Jimmy Buffett and Greg Taylor

I guess it all blew up in Missoula
There just was no other way
After months of going crazy
There was nothing left to say
But when the dust had finally settled
And the air had quickly cleared
Things were better off than I had feared

And I miss you so badly
Girl I love you madly
Feelin’ so sad now since I been gone
Gone, gone
And it gets quite confusin’
It seems that I’m loosin’ track of
the long days since I been home

Were stayin’ in a Holiday Inn full of cone heads
I guess they meet there once a year
They consume as quantites of Fiberglass
And get drunk on Cheap-ass beer
Then they’re off to catch a stripper
With their eyes glued to her G
But I don’t think that I would ever let them cut on me

And I miss you so badly
Girl I love you madly
I think I been had tho, for stayin so long
Long, long
And I’m just watchin’ the Gong show
Waitin’ for Zorro
Loosin’ the long day since I been home

I got a head of full of feelin’ higher
And an ear full of Patsy Cline
There is just no one who can touch her
Hell I’ll hang on every line
Oh crazy how things happen
It’s incredible but true
Oh the longer I’m gone the closer I feel to you

And I miss you so badly
Girl I love you madly
I’m feelin’ so glad just to be headin’ home
Home, home
And I been battling hotel maids
Chewin’ on Rolaids
Countin’ the hours `til I get home
Oh I been counting the hours `til I get home



Havana Daydreamin’ by Jimmy Buffett

Stashed his trash in Ecuador, bought a good suit of clothes
Flew on up to Mexico, standin’ by the shore
Waiting for some mystery man, to pay him for his time
Thinkin’ about all the money he made
couldn’t help to ease his mind
Havana daydreamin’ oh he’s just dreamin’ his life away

Daddy chopped that sugar cane
’til One day he fell dead
Jesus had a wanderin’ feelin’
Swimmin around in his head
Sailin’ on a midnight boat
There were no questions asked
Water’s so green and the air was so clean
That he stuck right to his task, Havana daydreamin’,
Oh he’s just schemin’, his life away

Ceilin’ fan stirs the air
Cigar smoke did swirl
A fragrance on the pillow case
And he thinks about the girl
Spillin’ wine wine and sharin’ good times
She sure could make him smile
He pays her well but what the hell
He’ll be movin’ in a little while, Havana daydreamin’
Havana daydreamin’
Oh he’ll be dreamin’ his life away



Margaritaville by Jimmy Buffett

Nibblin’ on sponge cake
Watching the sun bake
All of those tourists covered with oil
Just strummin’ my six string
On my front porch swing
Smell those shrimp
Well, they’re beginnin’ to boil (bubble, bubble, bubble)

Wasted away again in Margaritaville
Searchin’ for my lost shaker of salt
Some people claim that there’s a woman to blame
But I know it’s all Cecil’s fault

I don’t know the reason
Stayed here all season
With nothing to show but a brand new tatoo
But it’s a real beauty
A Mexican cutie
How it got here
I haven’t a clue

Wasted away again in Margaritaville
Searchin’ for my lost shaker of salt
Some people claim that there’s a woman to blame
But I know, it’s all Ronnie’s fault

Old men in tanks tops
Cruisin’ the gift shops
Checking out chiquitas down by the shore (Hey wanna ride in my new car baby?)
They dream about weight loss
Wish they could be their own boss
Those three day vacations become such a bore (Boring, Boring, Boring)

Wasted away again in Margaritaville
Searchin’ for my lost shaker of salt
Some people claim that there’s a woman to blame
But I know, it could be my fault

I blew out my flip flop
Stepped on a pop top
I broke my leg, had to limp on back home
God I still feel pain
I wish I had some cocaine!
But that’s been gone since early this morn’ (Go Get me a little!)

Wasted away again in Margaritaville
Searchin’ for my lost shaker of salt
Some people claim that there’s a woman to blame
But I know, it’s my own damn fault
Yes, and some people claim that there’s a woman
To blame (always is), and I know it’s my own damn fault


Changes In Latitudes, Changes In Attitudes by Jimmy Buffett

Ah yeah we’d loose our brains!

I took off for a weekend last month
Just to try and recall the whole year
All of the faces and all of the places
wonderin’ where they all disappeared
I didn’t ponder the question too long
I was hungry and went out for a bite
Ran into a chum with a bottle of rum
and we wound up drinkin’ all night

It’s these changes in latitudes
changes in attitudes nothing remains quite the same
With all of our running and all of our cunning
If we couldn’t laugh, we would all go insane

Reading departure signs in some big airport
Reminds me of the places I’ve been
Visions of good times that brought
so much pleasue
makes me want to go back again
If it suddenly ended tomarrow
I could somehow adjust to the fall
Good times and riches and son of a bitches
I’ve seen more than I can recall

With These changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes
Nothing remains quite the same
Through all of the islands and all of the highlands
If we couldn’t laugh we would all go insane

Ah we’d loose our brain!

I think about Paris when I’m high on red wine
I wish I could jump on a plane
And so many nights I just dream of the ocean
God, I wish I was sailin’ again
Oh, yesterdays are over my shoulder
So I can’t look back for too long (no way)
There’s just too much to see waiting in front of me
and I know that I just can’t go wrong
with these

It’s these changes in latitudes,
changes in attitudes nothing remains quite the same.
With all of our running and all of our cunning,
If we couldn’t laugh, we would all go insane
If we couldn’t laugh, we would all go insane
If we weren’t all crazy, we would go insane



Come Monday by Jimmy Buffett

Headin’ up to San Francisco
for the Labor Day weekend show
I’ve got my hush-puppies on
I guess I never was meant for
glitter rock and roll
And honey I didn’t know
that I’d be missin’ so

(Chorus)
Come Monday It’ll be all right
Come Monday I’ll be holding you tight
I spent four lonely days in a brown L.A. haze
and I just want you back by my side

Yes it’s been quite a summer,
rent-a-cars and west bound trains
And now your off on vacation
somethin’ you tried to explain
And darlin’ I love you so that’s
the reason I just let you go

Chorus

I can’t help it honey
your that much a part of me now
Remember the night in Montana when
we said there’d be no room for doubt

I hope your enjoyin’ the scen’ry
I know that it’s pretty up there
We can go hikin on Tuesday
with this cane I can walk anywhere
California has worn me quite thin
I just can’t wait to see you again



Perrier Blues by Jimmy Buffett

Ridin’ high atop the main mast
Harbor stretched out below
All day I’ve been feelin’ kind of half-assed
So I asked the boy to lower me slow
Lower me slow
Sat down and drank me some Perrier
Watched the seaplane disappear out of sight
Confused in my head well I jumped back in bed
Wondering who’s at the fronton tonight

Shinin’ bright

I don’t deny that I miss it
I’ve got this thing for applause
But like a cat on my rockin’ chair cushion
I’ve got to stretch my claws
Move my jaw

I know I’ve got the best of both worlds
Lord it sounds like a TV show
When that anchor goes down and the sails are all furled
Well it’s back on the road I go
Back I go

Where I bitch about the food and the weather
Wondering why the hell I ever came back
But knowing deep down I love this merry-go-round
And I can’t wait to lay down this track
When I get back

Yeah, I don’t deny that I love it
I’ve got this thing for a show
If the ball’s hit my way I’m going to glove it
‘Cause that’s the only thing I know
All I know

Yeah, I don’t deny that I miss it
I’ve got this thing for applause
But like a cat on my rockin’ chair cushion
I’ve got to stretch my claws
Move my jaw
Move my jaw

Can’t seem to lose those Perrier Blues
Can’t seem to lose those Perrier Blues
Can’t seem to lose those Perrier Blues



Grapefruit-Juicy Fruit by Jimmy Buffett

Grapefruit
Bathing suit
Chew a little Juicy Fruit
Wash away the night

Drive-in
Guzzle gin
Commit a little mortal sin
It’s good for the soul

(Bridge)
And don’t you know it gets so god damn lonely
When you’re on the plane all alone
And if I had the money, Honey
I’d strap you in beside me
And never ever leave you
Leave you at home all alone and crying

Ten speed
No need
My pick-up gets me where I please
Chuggin’ down the street, chug chug
But I’ll be leavin’
In a little while
So close your eyes and I’ll
Be back real soon

Come June July I don’t know!


(Repeat bridge)
(Repeat first verse)



God’s Own Drunk by Lord Buckley

Well, like I’ve explained many times in this town before,
I ain’t no drinkin’ man
I quit in Miami on Sunday
As My knees where shakin’ and my teeth were chatterin
I swore I’d never do it again

I promised my brother in-law that I’d go up to watch his still
While he went in to town to vote
It was right up on the mountain
where the map said it would be
Friends let me tell you one thing,
this wasn’t no ordinary still
It stood up on that mountain side
like a hugh golden opal

God’s little lantern’s twinklin on and off in the heavens
God’s big old yelleow moon shinin’ on the cool clear evenin’

Like I’ve explain’d many times before I ain’t no drinkin’ man
But on that particular occaison
This feeling comes over me
The temptation got the best of me
And I took a slash

That yella whiskey runnin’ down my throat
tasted like honey dew vine water
And I took another slash,
Took another’n an another’n an another’n
For you knew It I downed one whole jug of that shit
and commenced to gettin’ hot flashes

Goose pimples was runnin’ up and down my body
And this feelin’ came over me
like somethin’ I’d never experienced before
It was like, like I was in love
In love for the 935th time, with anything that moved
Animate, inanimate cone head no cone it didn’t matter

It’s like there’s a great neon sign flashin’ on an’ off
in my brain sayin’ "Jimmy Buffett you fool, there’s a great day a comin’"
`Cause I was drunk

I wasn’t knee crawlin’, coral reeferin’
Commode huggin’ drunk
I was God’s own drunk and a fearless man
And that’s when I first saw the bear

He was a Kodiak lookin’ fella `bout nineteen feet tall
He rambled up over the hill
expectin’ me to do one of two things,
Flip or fly, I didn’t do either one
It hung him up

He started sniffin’ around my body tryin’ to smell fear
But he ain’t gonna smell no fear `cause
I’m God’s own drunk and a fearless man
It hung him up

I had him on the run I thought to myself
Until he ate my sunglasses to show me he was a bad ass
And I had Just stole them from Eckerd’s and I was really Pissed off
Had a Eight dollar price tag on the sons of bitches

So when he pulled them off, my eyes
was a lot redder than his was
It hung him up

So I said "Mr. Bear, Sir. that respectful way you say sir
It’s like when your driving down the highway and you got
Feelin pretty confident ’cause you got a buzz buster in your car
19 smushed out joints an empty vile on the front seat, 27 cases of Budweiser in the back seat and the cops stop you
Yes Sir, I wouldn’t doin shit. Then he leans on you
So you gotta be nice and you go Please don’t take me in my old lady will kick my ass
I was only supposed to go to Buckhead to get the paper, next thing I knew I was on I-75 headed for florida

Sir, I love every hair on your twenty-seven acre body
I know you got a lot of friends over there
on the other side of stone mountain
There’s ole’ rare bear, tall bear, Freddy bear, Kelly bear
Really bear, smelly the bear, smokey the bear,
pokey the bear
I want you to go back over there tonight
And tell them I’m feelin’ right
You tell them I love each and everyone of them
like a brother and a sister
But if they give me any trouble tonight
As much as I hate to do it, i’m gonna have to run every God damn one of them right off the hill"

That’s what I Told him. He took two steps back and didn’t know what to say
Neither did I but I was god’s own drunk and a fearless man
I said "Mr. Bear, You know in the eyes of the Lord
we’re both beasts when it comes right down to it
So I want you to be my buddy, Buddy bear"

So I took ole’ buddy bear by his island size paw
and I led him over to the still
He’s a sniffin’ around that thing cause
he’s smellin’ somethin’ good

I gave him one of them jugs of honey dew vine water
He downed it up right
Looked like one of them bears in the circus
Sippin’ sasparilly in the moonlight
I gave him another’n an another’n an another’n
For I knew it he downed about eight of them
and commenced to doin’ the bear dance

First of all, you have to slide into second base, break your leg, Two snips, a snort, a fly turn, and a grunt
It was so simple like the bun galow
It plum evaded me

We worked ourselves into a tumultuous uproar
And I was awful tired and went over to the hillside
and I laid down and went to sleep
Slept for four hours and dreampt me some tremulous dreams
Think Cheryl Tweed was in one of ‘em

When I woke up, there was God’s yeller moon
shinin’ on the clear cool evenin’
God’s little lanterns twinklin’ on and off
in the heavens

And I looked around, no one to be found
Seems My buddy the bear was a missin’
Want to know something else friends and neighbors
So was that still



He Went to Paris by Jimmy Buffett

He went to Paris looking for answers
To questions that bothered him so
He was impressive, young and aggressive
Saving the world on his own
But the warm Summer breezes
The French wines and cheeses
Put his ambition at bay
And Summers and Winters
Scattered like splinters
And four or five years slipped away

Then he went to England, played the piano
And married an actress named Kim
They had a good life, she was a good wife
Bore him a young son named Jim
And all of the answers and all of the questions
He locked in his attic one day
‘Cause he liked the quiet clean country living
And twenty more years slipped away

Well the war took his baby, the bombs killed his lady
And left him with only on eye
His body was battered, his world was shattered
And all he could do was just cry.
While the tears were falling, he was recalling
The answers he never found
So he hopped on a freighter, skidded the ocean
And left England without a sound

Now he lives in the islands, fishes the pilin’s
And drinks his green label each day
He’s writing his memoirs and losing his hearing
But he don’t care what most people say
Through eighty-six years of perpetual motion
If he likes you he’ll smile then he’ll say
Jimmy, some of it’s magic, some of it’s tragic
But I had a good life all the way

He went to Paris looking for answers
To questions that bother him so



The Captain And The Kid by Jimmy Buffett

I never use to miss the chance
to climb upon his knee and listen
to the many tales of life upon the sea

We’d go sailing back on barkentines and
talk of things he did, tomorrow just a
day away for the Captain and the Kid

His world had gone from sailing ships
to raking mom’s back yard
he never could adjust to land although
he tried so hard

We both were growing older then and
wiser with our years
that’s when I came to understand
the course his heart still steers

He died about a month ago
while winter filled the air
and though I cried, I was so proud
to love a man so rare

He’s somewhere on the ocean now
the place he ought to be
with one hand on the starboard rail
he’s waving back at me
For the Captain and this kid



Why Don’t We Get Drunk and Screw by Jimmy Buffett

I really do appreciate the fact you’re sittin’ here
Your voice sounds so wonderful
But your face don’t look too clear
So, Barmaid, bring a pitcher, another round of brew
Honey, why don’t we get drunk and screw

(Chorus)
Why don’t we get drunk and screw
I just bought a waterbed filled up with elmer’s glue
They say you are a snuff queen, Honey, I don’t think that’s true
So, why don’t we get drunk and screw, Alright boys and girls, let’s swing

(Instrumental)
Why don’t we get stoned and screw, Oh how’d you like that!
I just found a little good columbian herb and we’ll smoke it all me and you
After all of that shit, If either one of us can move
So, why don’t we get drunk and screw



A Pirate Looks At Forty by Jimmy Buffett

Mother, mother ocean, I have heard you call
Wanted to sail upon your waters
since I was three feet tall
You’ve seen it all, you’ve seen it all

Watch the men who rode you
Switch from sails to steam
And in your belly you hold the treasure
that few have ever seen, most of them dreams
Most of them dreams

Yes, I am a pirate two hundred years too late
The cannons don’t thunder there’s nothin’ to plunder
I’m an over forty victim of fate
Arriving too late, arriving too late

I’ve done a bit of smugglin’
I’ve run my share of grass
I made enough money to buy Miami
But I pissed it away so fast
Never meant to last, never meant to last

I have been drunk now for over two weeks,
I passed out and I rallied and I sprung a few leaks
But I’ve got to stop wishin’
Got to go fishin’, I’m down to rock bottom again
Just a few friends, just a few friends, We got any Friends here in Miami Florida? I Thought so

Instrumental

I go for younger women, lived with several awhile
And though I ran away, Hell, they’ll come back one day
And still could manage a smile
It just takes awhile, just takes awhile

Mother, mother ocean, after all these years I’ve found
My occupational hazard being my occupations
just not around
I feel like I’ve drowned
But I Want Wear a Frown
Just feel like I’ve drowned,
Gonna Get Drunk uptown



Tampico Trauma by Jimmy Buffett

I must look a mess I must admit
But I have been traveling quite a bit, How Long now?
South of the border where the law and order
Is kept by Federales who just grin
And tell you they just want to be your friend
They tell you they just want to be your friend
I left for Tampico last July
I jumped off that boat I almost died

There to greet us were pretty senioritas (Good God!)
I swore that I would not go home with them
All those lovely ladies were my friends
You know those sweet chiquitas they don’t pretend
Como esta, Senorita?

That is all I really want to say
I was thrown out of Atlanta yesterday
You see I was drinkin’ doubles
Causin’ lots of trouble
When the man looked in the window of the bar and he grinned
He said if you come back we just may not be your friend
I don’t want to see your ass ’round here again
Look’s like those Werewolves from Buckhead again



Morris’ Nightmare by Jimmy Buffett

Down in the islands where the happy folks stay
Everybody do what Bwana Jim say
He say its ok, it’s ok

You can do what you wanna
Do what you like
Twist a big ol’ number
Ride a motorbike
It’s alright, It’s alright

Dance to the drum
Drink a lot of rum
Love till you come to a stop

Swing like a monkey in a coconut tree
Sing like the dolphins in the deep blue sea
Sing it’s alright, it’s alright, How does Fred Neil do it? Come on Jay Spell

You know people in the city got nowhere to go
They used to go to bars now they go to Discos
No, no, no disco, uh-uh, no

They never see the sun
They hardly see the moon
They barely see the ground ’til the snow melts in June
Uptight, It’s out of sight

So they save a little money
Take a little trip
They only see the islands from a tacky cruise ship

Buy a little liquor
Buy some sea shells
Husband tries to sleep
Wife just yells
Morris, you can sleep when you get home

Down in the islands where the happy folks stay
Everybody do what Biwana man say
He say its ok, it’s ok
It’s alright, it’s alright
Do what you wanna, do what you like, Bitch Bitch Bitch!



Dixie Diner by Larry Raspberry, Greg Taylor, C. Ferrante, Rocky Berretta, and B. Marshall

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. wooo. we’re going to take you up that Mississippi river
Now one time. yeah one time. up to an old favorite town of mine where i
Visit now and then just for one special reason, that’s good eatin’ ’cause
I know a place on Tillman St. between Poplar and Summer that can’t be beat.
Emma Mae been cookin’ there for forty-eight years and she ain’t missed a
Lick yet baby. she’s got hot sweet potatoes and cracklin’ bread. ooh. and
Mulligan stew to turn Jimmy Buffett’s head woo, black-eyed peas and them
Good ol’ collard greens, wooo. you know…
You know what…
What?
That nothin’ could be finer than to sit down and eat’n at the dixie diner."

"Alright Miami give it up. rock and roll on a Monday night."

"Help this skinny boy out. we’ve got two more days."

"Good rockin’ tonight."

"I hear you professor."

"Thank you, thank you very much. God bless you. you’re still the greatest.
We love ya."